My Sweet Emma

Emma has a unique story. For the first seven weeks of her life, it was just the two of us and Caroline. My Mom was with me during delivery, and I traveled on the weekends to my parents, but for the majority of those weeks it was just us because Tyler was away. She came into the world on her own time, precisely when the Lord wanted her to appear, but it was still her time, not mine. AND this sweet girl came into the world SIDEWAYS, you read that correctly, sideways.

My Emma is a good baby; one who, even as a newborn, would sprawl out to sleep and when her tummy was full. She is energetic, strong, and super happy!

Yet in all the positive, I had trouble reading her, particularly from two months old until recently. I have felt so much guilt and angst about this. Thoughts of "you've done this before" or "what are you not trying or doing right?" crept into my head and stayed there, especially on nights when I just couldn't find a way to console my precious baby. I felt so embarrassed to admit these thoughts and feelings because she is my baby and I should know her better than anyone else. I also thought that I was the only Mom in the world to ever have these thoughts -- I now firmly believe I am not alone.

So this week we tried something new. Yes, my friends, 6.5 months into her life we're still figuring out Emma. I have been more aggressive about her napping and eating real food. I have found that Emma will happily push through whatever we are doing instead of napping as she should. So, I have discovered her little cues and when she is more clingy than usual, off to bed it is for her.

This new awareness of Emma's cues has made the last week better for all of us. Emma plays more and is less clingy, particularly around dinner time and she has even slept through the night a few nights this week -- a giant blessing from above.