Best Friends

Bella is quite tolerant of Caroline. Here are a few sweet pictures of Bella and Caroline tonight. I was having Caroline practice standing tonight, and Bella makes a very good distraction/incentive to stay on her feet. At the end of Caroline's shannagins, she gives Bella a treat. Bella in return is quite patient and gentle in taking the treat out of Caroline's sweet, small hand!! Happy Monday, friends!

Baby Dedication

Many of you have heard us speak of our beloved church in Alaska. We were very fortunate to find an amazing church here, one that we are both going to struggle to leave. Like us, our church believes in dedicating its children to the church, not baptizing them, as that is a personal decision, one that cannot be made for a person no matter how big or small.

Tyler and I dedicated Caroline to the church last Sunday. We were thrilled that we got to do this in a church that we both love, a place that believes in its body of believers and serving the community around it. Anchorage is a better place because of the people of this church and their heart for the community.

We are so incredibly thankful that we were here, healthy and able to participate in dedicating Caroline. When Rod, the senior pastor pictured with us below, made the cross on her forehead, she held his fingers. As Rod began to pray for us and Caroline specifically, it was bittersweet for us all. The deep joy and thankfulness for Caroline's health, the reality of our move and the realization of what a blessing this church has been to us and vice-versa drummed up many emotions for us all.

 
Although we cannot make the decision for her, we pray that Caroline will find Jesus and ask Him into her heart. We pray that she will be a servant to others and kind to everyone she meets. I pray that she finds her own faith and reasons to believe in Jesus instead of just taking mine and Tyler's word for it.

Now they were bringing even infants to him that he might touch them. And when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.”
(Luke 18:15-17 ESV)

Tomorrow is the BIG DAY!

Caroline is FIVE months old today, and that seems so crazy to me. Her fourth month was most certainly exciting, but I'm hoping that the next month, although logistically crazy is a bit more low-key!!

Caroline has been on an oral medication, 3 times a day for the last month. The medicine is supposed to stop the growth/shrink the hemangiomas on her liver. She has continued to be monitored during weekly heart/vitals checks over the last month, but we have no indication of whether or not the medicine is working. But ... tomorrow is the day. Caroline had ultrasounds this morning that we will take to Dr. Semancik, her pediatric GI doctor at Providence Medical Center in Anchorage. Dr. Semancik saw Caroline the weekend we were admitted at Prov. He came in each day to check on her, and we instantly hit it off because he is a retired Army doc and just a really nice person. Dr. Semancik is the person who will tell us if the medicine is working, and what the treatment plan is from here.

 

Although I'm super excited to see him and hear what he thinks of Caroline's liver, I'm honestly getting a bit nervous. I have no reason to believe the medicine isn't working or to believe that Caroline's condition has worsened, but I also had no reason to believe my happy, healthy four month would be sent for ultrasounds and lab work after a well-baby appointment a month ago today. I'm hopeful, but a bit nervous. Please, say a prayer tomorrow around 1 pm Alaska time if you think of us.

We'll keep you posted on the good news that we receive tomorrow!

Great Expectations

It is amazing to look at my life over the last six months(ish) and see what the good Lord is trying desperately to teach me. I have discovered that I have expectations of what I've dreamed my life would be or what I plan my life to be, and quite often over the last few months my expectations have been blown and I've been thrown completely for a loop. Do not get my wrong, I have high expectations for my faith, my marriage, my child. I had high expectations for my students when I taught school, but these expectations are different.

After joyfully announcing that I was pregnant, I could not wait for my family to see me pregnant and then to meet the baby. I had always envisioned mine and my husband's family's waiting in the waiting room for the news that the baby is here. I envisioned my child meeting it's grandparents, aunts and uncles within a few days. But being 4,000 miles away from our families meant that there was no one waiting in the waiting room for the big news. There was just my new family of three that would be tucked in together that night and ready for life ahead as a three-some.

I had visions of the four-generations pictures with all four sets of grandparents. Tyler and I were incredibly lucky that our grandparents were all present for our wedding, and I expected that they would all meet my first (at least) child. But sadly, my Mimi passed away eight days before Caroline was born. Caroline will never know my beloved Mimi, but now she gets her own.

 My Mimi and me.

 Caroline and her Mimi

On the same note, I'd always been told that I would be flown home when one of my grandparents died. This was not something I need to worry about regardless of where I was in the world. But because I was 38 weeks pregnant, I physically could not fly for my Mimi's funeral. I was in Alaska with Tyler while my entire family celebrated her life and leaned on each other for strength.

Although my expectations or visions for my life have not always been met, I can stand before you and say that my life, my faith and my family are better for it. I did not envision that I would rely on my husband and the Lord alone when my Mimi died or that the simple hours after Caroline's birth as a new three-some would be some of the most wonderful of my life or that I would fall in love with my husband and child all over again when she turned four months old in Seattle Children's Hospital hundreds of miles away from our home and from our family's homes.

I never envisioned that I would not ask God "why" or be angry when I got the news that my child was sick or that I would not waiver from the fact that I believed she was going to be okay. Was I sad? Yes. Was I scared? Sometimes. Am I the perfect Christian? No. Do I pray as often as I should? No.  
But am I thankful for the Lord's plan for me?! Most certainly.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans for you to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." 

-- Jeremiah 29:11 --

Living the Dream!

Week Four of Living the Dream is upon us, and we were asked to do something kind for a neighbor ... anything! Well that opportunity arises quite often in our neighborhood, and I just happened to complete the challenge this morning. I hoped over the hill (not so much now because of the snow) to my friend and neighbor's house to keep her two boys for about an hour today. Last spring/summer I would literally walk over the hill from my backyard to hers to hang out or watch the boys while she ran out.

I will truly miss that about Alaska and this neighborhood, but I have a feeling the close-knit neighborhood will be at every post we live.

What can you do for your neighbor this week?!

Wordless Wednesday

Conversations

Caroline has become much more vocal in the last few days. She is a generally quiet baby, but there are times when she has things to "say" and she thinks she communicates them effectively. I love having conversations with her and seeing the excitement on her face as she tells me whatever it is she is thinking.

Here is a small glimpse of our conversations. She loves to talk and smile, but as soon as she sees a camera she just stops ... she is much more of a face-to-face person!

Nine Weeks.

In less than nine weeks, we will look like this: 

We will leave here: 

and go here:

And my heart is heavy. This move will be bittersweet to say the least. The great state of Alaska has been good to Tyler and me. We have strengthened our marriage, made many new friends, fallen in love with a community-driven church, welcomed our first child into the world, experienced Army life, experienced temperatures we never dreamed we would, shoveled snow on a regular basis, and SO. MUCH. MORE. 

Don't get me wrong, I have looked forward to the day we would be closer to North Carolina, the day we would move to a place with a warm Spring and a HOT summer; the day we would drive out of Alaska on our next great adventure. Yet, somehow in the excitement of it all, I failed to think of the people who we will say "good-bye" to. People who have, in many ways, become our family over the last three years. I have learned to rely on friends in ways I never have before. For help, comfort, holiday get-togethers, birthday celebrations, homecomings, and deployments just to name a few.

I am beginning to get organized and make plans for our move. We are beginning to check things off our list, PURGE our closets and mentally stack things into "going with us" or "the movers with take" piles. But although my brain is getting ready, my heart is being slow to follow. In some ways I wish we could say good-bye and leave tomorrow, in others I wish we could stay forever. 

Bear with me as I struggle through this move ... the excitement, the sadness, the details, the organizations, the good and the bad. This is the first time we'll leave a duty-station, and no one tells you how upsetting it can be.

We are fortunate that some of our friends will come with us and some of the friends we were in Missouri with last time will come back, too. This is a blessing that every military family tells you about over and over. For this reason -- the hope of seeing old friends and making new friends again -- the move is exciting and the good-byes aren't as sad.  

Alaska, we're sad to leave, but Missouri we're excited to see you soon!!